Friday, August 17, 2012

Just Be Glad You're Not Me Today

We all have bad days, but my friend Dani had the worst of all possible days.  The good news is that she has a superb sense of humor so she was laughing about it almost immediately after it happened and she sent me the email below about it.  I thought her humor/misery might make your day seem better.  And she told me I could share it with you because she's awesome.  Here is what her email said:

Just for fun, I'd like to document my day.  Go on.  Read it.  And be happy you aren't me today:
  • Went to the dentist and paid $760 for an exam and a night mouth guard
  • Dentist told me I have gum disease and I need an extensive cleaning at an additional cost of $860
  • Didn't get my teeth cleaned at all because the hygienist's husband came in to get her because of a family emergency
  • Picked up Ella and told her we were going to go have a nice girls lunch at our favorite coffee shop
  • After I parked in the parking garage Ella told me she peed in her car seat.
  • Left coffee shop without eating and without getting our parking ticket validated
  • Came home and let Ella in the house so I could take her car seat out of the car
  • While I was getting the car seat out of the car, Ella got her lunch box out of her backpack and proceeded to eat heavily seasoned salmon on our freshly washed white couch.  She got salmon everywhere.
  • I put the couch cushion cover in the washer
  • Ella got mad at me because I wouldn't let her take a dump in the measuring cup she was playing with
  • Went back outside to wash off car seat
  • While I was outside, heard Ella screaming.  She was jumping on the couch (she said Daddy told her it was ok) and she hit her head
  • Calmed Ella down and went to take some medicine for the migraine I have
  • Dropped the brand new bottle of pills spilling all 300 pills on the floor of our pantry
  • Put Ella down for a nap
  • Heard Ella yelling not long after and went to check on her
  • She had taken off her pull up and peed all over her bed
  • Put the couch cushion cover in the dryer and put Ella's bedding in the washer
  • As I'm typing this at the desk in the guest room, Ella is going potty in the toilet right next to me.  I hear a loud gushing of liquid and look over to see her sitting on the toilet, leaning way back with her legs propped up on the toilet seat in front of her and her pee shooting straight out into the air and splashing to the floor like she has a wiener!
I was rolling on the floor laughing when I read this and I hope it made you smile too.  I will tell you that it was shortly after this that my dear friend asked me for some ideas on keeping her daughter busy.  At the time, I hadn't published my book yet, but I gave her the rough draft.  She has held her hand on her heart and she is slightly biased since she is my dear friend, but she truly says all the ideas I had on keeping your kid busy, such as sand, water, fine motor skills, etc., have really helped her and her daughter.  Maybe they will help you too!  I wrote the book with former Kindergarten Teacher, Susan Case, and we give a Mom and a Teacher perspective on why it's so important to keep your kids challenged and how it can truly make your life better.

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  1. Oh I laughed only because I know that feeling. Sounds like your friend has her hands full!

  2. I could not stop laughing as I read this aloud to my husband. I have had this kind of day so many times. This stuff isn't funny as it's happening, but it sure makes for great stories :-)Thanks for sharing and making me laugh and smile.

    1. I'm so glad it made you laugh! And you're right it just takes a bit before you have a great story!! ;-)

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