Are We Robbing Our Kids of a Childhood?

Did you know that 75% of all American children are enrolled in daycare centers?   A new study was published this week in the American Journal of Pediatrics that finds that these daycare children are largely sedentary and are only spending 2-3% of their day doing vigorous physical activity.  This is way down from the recommended levels and it means that the vast majority of American children are starting out their lives way behind in gross motor skills.  The researchers found three reasons for the largely sedentary lifestyle in day cares:

1.  Injury concerns (Daycare providers are afraid of being sued and also say that parents urge them not to let the children play vigorously, for fear of injury)
2.  Financial (They don't have the money to buy safe equipment and also state that the equipment that is "safe" isn't interesting or fun for kids so they don't see any reason to waste the money.  That's ironic, isn't it?)
3.  Emphasis on academics (Society has placed such importance on reading and test scores that parents are feeling the pressure and are worried their kids won't know the letters and numbers at an early age.  The daycare centers that were studied stated that parents were more concerned about what their children "learned" that day, rather than how much they played and that parents put a lot of pressure on the daycare centers to emphasize academics to "prepare" children for school.)

My kids don't go to daycare, but my observation is that most daycares are wonderful.  The teachers really do care about the children and there are regulations in place that keep things very safe and clean.  However, according this study, the problem is that after kids get home from daycare, it's often time to have dinner and a bath and go to bed, so the daytime is the only time they would have to play outside and play vigorously and since they aren't getting it there, they might not be getting it at all.

Think back for a minute to when you were a kid.  Do you remember sitting around learning numbers and letters?  Of course not.  You remember riding bikes to the pool, catching fireflies, or maybe climbing a tree with your best friend.  Obviously children need to read, but people have been learning to read for hundreds and thousands of years, so why do we think we need to drill this into our children's head at age 3?  Why do we think we need computer programs to teach our children to read?

I have heard that many Kindergarten teachers are now using computer programs to teach children how to read.  Can you imagine?  Many experts maintain that children learn by doing, by interacting, and by touching, and not by computers.  I'm sure computers are fine in moderation, but I find it extremely alarming that any school would use a computer program as the primary teaching plan for the academic year.  It's almost like schools don't care about fun, social skills, or problem-solving.  They only care about test scores. 

To me, this illustrates so clearly how the emphasis on academics is stealing childhood from our children.  As parents, I think we need to protest.  The pressure for children to perform well in school is so intense that people feel the need to start preparing at age 2 or 3.  I know that I feel the pressure sometimes.  I don't want my kids to get behind, but I think we need to draw a line somewhere.  Homework is getting so out of control in many grade schools that kids don't even have time to play outside after school.  This is tragic.  Getting a good score when they are ten years old doesn't guarantee success in life.  People grow up to be successful and happy in life when they are confident, self-reliant, and aren't lazy and are willing to work for success.  When we deprive our children the opportunity to play outside and play with other children, we rob them of chances to learn these valuable skills.  Let's give our children something to remember about their childhood, other than sitting in front of a computer while they learn numbers and letters.  Let's make some memories with our kids and quit worrying so much about test scores.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not a perfect Mom by any means, but I LOVE watching my kids play vigorously and get exercise.  After all, see what kids can do if we just give them some time to be kids?  

New Insight on How to Cultivate Little Brains

Don't you just love it when you read a book and it really changes your perspective?  When it really makes you start thinking about things in a new way?  I recently read a book written by a Kindergarten teacher and it really has changed the way I interact with the kids.  For example, here is one section that really opened my eyes:

"Decode your child's questions.  A curious child's questions may seem never ending but they reflect a child's cognitive and emotional development.  Parents should take their child's questions seriously and answer in a way that will strengthen and deepen the relationship.  Don't just always say 'yes."

Keep in mind that Munchkin Girl talks ALL the time.  Even though I do try to to answer her, sometimes I can't hear her in the car very well so I find myself saying, "I don't know.  That's a good question."  Or, "Yes, you got it!"  I never tell her to stop talking, but I don't really appreciate what she's saying.  My mind is always on which customer I need to call back or what needs to be added to the grocery list.

It never occurred to me that her questions would help her in her development.  So, the other day on the way home from my parent's house, it was late and I was alone with the kids (seems to be a common theme on this blog, huh??  He's an orthopedic surgery resident).  She was murmuring something in the back and so I asked her to talk louder so I could hear. 

"Mommy, where did the sun go?"

"It went to bed already," I replied.

"Mommy, where is the sun's bed?  Is it comfortable?"

Look what happened when I really listened and took her seriously!  I really got to see her little mind at work and it made me so proud that she made the jump from me telling her the sun went to bed to her thinking about the sun's bed.  Being a Mom really can be fun if you're not distracted.

Another section that really helped me was the section on Play:

"Promote the artist in your child....Make learning fun.  For example, 'Is there something blue in this room?'  Give your child a notebook and play Blue's Clues.  Help your child find different shapes in the environment..."

Normally I put the dishes away in the morning, and again, my mind is in the clouds, thinking about all the things I need to pack for the day, both for myself and for the kids.  I sell medical equipment so every day I have to pack my car full of equipment, my computer, etc.  However, I decided to really focus on Munchkin Girl this time.  As I was putting away the dishes, I asked her to help me.  I kid you not, she picked up the crockpot cover and looked at me and said, "Mommy, what shape is this?"

"That's an oval," I said.

"Is that different than a circle?" 

So I took her over to her chalkboard and showed her the difference.  Now she loves to draw ovals and she's so proud of herself for knowing what it is.

This book also says:

"Play is an expression of the soul.  Take children to a park to swing."

I happen to agree with this.  My kids definitely think swinging is good for the soul, even Little Buddy who isn't even old enough to do it right yet.



One of the things I have loved about writing this blog is the wonderful people I have met along the way.  The author of this book, Susan Case, sent me this book several weeks ago to review and although it sounded interesting, I've been busy and didn't get to it right away.  Plus, my daughter is only three so I wasn't sure how much it would apply.

I have to say, I think even though the title is about Kindergarten, I really did enjoy this book and I think all Moms could really get a lot out of reading it.  I found it to be pretty inspiring and her love for children really comes through in her writing.  Her ideas and persepective as a teacher helps me see what my daughter is capable of learning.  The book also has good tips on how to get kids ready for school.  I will say that it is also geared toward kindergarten teachers, so I recommend that you skip the first two chapters and then go back and read them later when you have time. 

The book is called Kindergarten: Tattle-Tales, Tools, Tactics, Triumphs and Tasty Treats for Teachers and Parents. Susan taught Special Education, Early Childhood, and Kindergarten and now edits and writes. You can visit her blog at Kindergarten for Teachers and Parents.

If you do read it, let me know what you think! 

PS...I got no money at all for this review and will make no money off the sales of the book.  I just really did like it!!