Why Kids Brains Need to Be Nourished and How to Do it

My daughter was two when her little brother was born.  I was convinced that our transition would be smooth and easy.  She'd always been an easy toddler and an independent girl.  I couldn't have been more wrong.  She became whiny and needy and I found myself yelling at her and then feeling so bad after I yelled.  She was just a little girl at the time and really didn't know any better, but a Mom can only take so much.
When I suddenly found myself trying to cook dinner with one hand while my newborn cried and my toddler clung to my leg, I knew something needed to change. 

It turns out that my daughter just needed more meaningful time with me.  She needed to be challenged and complimented for something she had truly accomplished.  In other words, I wasn't nourishing my daughter's active mind so when I suddenly wasn't giving her my full attention, she started acting out.  I always figured that my daughter would start learning what she needed to know when she got to Kindergarten.  What I didn't know is that only 25% of the human brain is developed at birth and a lot of the neurons are connected and formed before the age of five.

Yet I know what you're thinking.  How can I possibly find the time to teach my kid when I barely have time for the laundry, the cooking and taking care all the day to day house stuff?  Well I'm here to tell you, that if you do this right, you will end up with MORE free time.  I promise.  Even if you don't care about connecting neurons, you will care about this: once I brought home some basic stuff from Hobby Lobby, like sand, funnels, buttons, colored rice, Pom Poms, etc. and started spending thirty solid minutes with her each day, she became a new kid.  Suddenly she wasn't clinging to me every day.  She was challenged and felt loved and connected with me during this time and suddenly she had the confidence to play alone again.

I want to share with you that after months and months and months of hard work, waking up at 4 am to write, my book is finally ready!  I have teamed up with former Kindergarten teacher and author, Susan Case, to write a book called, The Happy Mommy Handbook: The Ultimate How-to Guide on Keeping Your Toddlers and Preschoolers Busy, Out of Trouble, and Motivated to Learn.  This book is written in a unique way: from the perspective of both a mom and a teacher.  Not only do you get my "Mom" view, you also get advice from a Teacher.  Each chapter introduces a problem that I have actually faced in my real life.  Susan Case is a former Kindergarten teacher who offers advice after each scenario and educates the reader on skills that young children should be working on, such as fine motor and sensory skills.  At the end of each chapter, we introduce dozens of games and activities that we have developed for you to do with your small children, including photos and detailed instructions.  If you've been a reader of my blog, you will understand what the book can offer to you.  We have compiled some of the ideas from my blog, along with dozens of new ideas and put them into an easy-to-read format.  You will understand how each activity can truly benefit both you and your child.  This book is not about fancy projects that are difficult and time-consuming.  It's about having fun with your kids and helping them learn so you can have a more peaceful house-hold.  Not every Mom is a crafting genius so the book also gives practical advice on what you should buy and how to organize your supplies and the activities are generally inexpensive and easy.    

The goals of this book are simple: to give you more free time, smarter and happier children, and most of all, to allow you to enjoy and make the most of the early years with your children because kids really do grow up fast. The book is available in both paperback ($9.99) and on Kindle and iBooks ($3.99)

Chapter Titles:

Chapter One: Keeping Kids Busy With Sensory Activities

Chapter Two: Keeping Kids Busy With Fine Motor Activities

Chapter Three: Crafts and Art Projects

Chapter Four: Playing Inside

Chapter Five: Playing Outside

Chapter Six: Nurturing Yourself So You Can Nurture Your Children

Chapter Seven: Enjoying Your Kids to Fullest by Developing Wonderful Behavior

Chapter Eight: How to Prepare Your Children for Kindergarten

Chapter Nine: Helping Your Child Learn to Read

Chapter Ten: Helping Your Child Learn Math and Science

Chapter Eleven: Summary and Resources

 


 


Did you enjoy my post?  Don't forget to vote for me by clicking the banner below.  You can also enter your email address below to receive all my updates!  I really appreciate your support!! Want to see all my posts?  Put your email address here to become a subscriber!

Enter your email address:

Are We Robbing Our Kids of a Childhood?

Did you know that 75% of all American children are enrolled in daycare centers?   A new study was published this week in the American Journal of Pediatrics that finds that these daycare children are largely sedentary and are only spending 2-3% of their day doing vigorous physical activity.  This is way down from the recommended levels and it means that the vast majority of American children are starting out their lives way behind in gross motor skills.  The researchers found three reasons for the largely sedentary lifestyle in day cares:

1.  Injury concerns (Daycare providers are afraid of being sued and also say that parents urge them not to let the children play vigorously, for fear of injury)
2.  Financial (They don't have the money to buy safe equipment and also state that the equipment that is "safe" isn't interesting or fun for kids so they don't see any reason to waste the money.  That's ironic, isn't it?)
3.  Emphasis on academics (Society has placed such importance on reading and test scores that parents are feeling the pressure and are worried their kids won't know the letters and numbers at an early age.  The daycare centers that were studied stated that parents were more concerned about what their children "learned" that day, rather than how much they played and that parents put a lot of pressure on the daycare centers to emphasize academics to "prepare" children for school.)

My kids don't go to daycare, but my observation is that most daycares are wonderful.  The teachers really do care about the children and there are regulations in place that keep things very safe and clean.  However, according this study, the problem is that after kids get home from daycare, it's often time to have dinner and a bath and go to bed, so the daytime is the only time they would have to play outside and play vigorously and since they aren't getting it there, they might not be getting it at all.

Think back for a minute to when you were a kid.  Do you remember sitting around learning numbers and letters?  Of course not.  You remember riding bikes to the pool, catching fireflies, or maybe climbing a tree with your best friend.  Obviously children need to read, but people have been learning to read for hundreds and thousands of years, so why do we think we need to drill this into our children's head at age 3?  Why do we think we need computer programs to teach our children to read?

I have heard that many Kindergarten teachers are now using computer programs to teach children how to read.  Can you imagine?  Many experts maintain that children learn by doing, by interacting, and by touching, and not by computers.  I'm sure computers are fine in moderation, but I find it extremely alarming that any school would use a computer program as the primary teaching plan for the academic year.  It's almost like schools don't care about fun, social skills, or problem-solving.  They only care about test scores. 

To me, this illustrates so clearly how the emphasis on academics is stealing childhood from our children.  As parents, I think we need to protest.  The pressure for children to perform well in school is so intense that people feel the need to start preparing at age 2 or 3.  I know that I feel the pressure sometimes.  I don't want my kids to get behind, but I think we need to draw a line somewhere.  Homework is getting so out of control in many grade schools that kids don't even have time to play outside after school.  This is tragic.  Getting a good score when they are ten years old doesn't guarantee success in life.  People grow up to be successful and happy in life when they are confident, self-reliant, and aren't lazy and are willing to work for success.  When we deprive our children the opportunity to play outside and play with other children, we rob them of chances to learn these valuable skills.  Let's give our children something to remember about their childhood, other than sitting in front of a computer while they learn numbers and letters.  Let's make some memories with our kids and quit worrying so much about test scores.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not a perfect Mom by any means, but I LOVE watching my kids play vigorously and get exercise.  After all, see what kids can do if we just give them some time to be kids?  

Gender Confusion

Little Buddy LOVES his big sister.  Sometimes she hugs him a little too hard.  Sometimes she pushes him when he tries to get her special toys.  But the the vast majority of the time his eyes lovingly follow her wherever she goes.  When they were younger, this was mostly adorable and we would laugh.  As they've gotten older though, it's become a bit of a problem.

Take yesterday.  Munchkin Girl gets a sticker every time she sleeps all night without waking us up.  She used to wake us up to literally play with her.  Or she'd remember a doll she left downstairs and want us to go get it for her at 2am.  Thus the creation of the sticker program, which has been great!  However, yesterday, I told her it was time to get a sticker.  Little Buddy isn't saying much yet so I keep making the mistake of thinking he doesn't understand quite everything I say.  I'm wrong.  He understands EVERYTHING!!

After Munchkin Girl got to pick out her sticker and put it on the fridge, he came over and started grunting at me and pointing at the stickers.  Even started stomping his feet.  I pulled off a sticker and handed it to him.  He went over the fridge with it, and pointed and grunted at Little Munchkin's sticker chart. 

"Hey Mom, he didn't sleep all night, he doesn't get a sticker, does he???" 

Conundrum.  He DID sleep all night.  In fact, he always sleeps all night.  Is he really getting this?  Does he really want me to put a sticker on the chart for him?  He literally stood there, grunting and whining while holding his sticker and pointing at the fridge.  Out of curiosity, I put it on the chart to see if that was what he wanted.  Sure enough, he grinned ear to ear, smiled at Munchkin Girl in delight, and walked away to find something else to do.  He's 17 months, so this was pretty shocking that understood this much and wanted to emulate Munchkin Girl this much. 

Sooo...., this brings me to the real issue at hand.  He is slightly obssessed with purses.  And earrings.  And teasets.



Don't miss the giant pretend earing he is wearing.  He FORCED me to put it on.  I swear.  Again, a lot of grunting and whining while holding the earing until I caved and clamped that earing on his little ear.  He wore it all during dinner.

Despite all this, he is ALL boy.  He romps in the mud, plays in sprinklers, his first word was "Ball".  Hubby is slighly upset by this whole obsession with Little Munchkin's things.  Everytime he carries a purse around, Hubby gets a little exasperated and starts kicking a ball at him with almost a bit of OCD behanior if you ask me, trying to entice him to drop his purse and start playing soccer.

But my theory is that he just wants to be like his big sister.  He LOVES her and watche her play with these things every day and he thinks that is just what people do.  Don't get me wrong though.  If pink turns out to be his favorite color, we will still loves him just as much!! :-)